The End of College Money
May 2, 2010
We’re so accustomed to thinking of money as a symbol of security or power or success or influence. But can it also be a symbol of love?
Money and Love? Can they really go together if we’re talking about something other than the love of money? Until recently I might not have thought so. But then I encountered a situation in my own life where money was all about love. It made me sad and happy all at once, brought tears and memories and joy.
Being the good financial advisor that I am, I have always been very serious about saving money for what was a high priority in my family – education. And so from the time my kids were infants, their dad and I put money aside for their college. Through thick and thin we saved – when we could easily afford it and when we couldn’t. There were some gifts from grandparents and, of course, the stock market made its contribution as well.
After what seemed like years, my oldest was ready for college and, happily, there was a pool of tuition money that meant she had a few choices about what schools she could attend.
She began what turned out to be a glorious and successful college career for her – exactly what any parent would hope for and just what this young girl from Oklahoma dreamed of.
Now, four years later, she’s ready to graduate and move into the next phase of life. And so, not too long ago, I wrote the last check to her school. I withdrew the last amount from that college fund. The money had done its job. It had lasted. We’d made it through. The goal had been met. My girl was ready to graduate, step out into the world and take it by storm.
But the last check? Really? As I wrote out that check, my eyes filled with tears. I felt such a mix of emotions. I know that many parents would have felt jubilation, success, and relief. And I felt those things too. But I also felt my love for her and the end of an era. It wasn’t just the end of the college bills and the end of the college fund. It was the end of a stage of her life and mine.
Some people might say that money is a poor symbol for all the emotion that goes with this monumental transition in the life of your first born. But why not money?
Money had been the object of all my work and her dad’s as we saved.
Money had been one more way grandparents could participate in her future.
Money, successfully saved, had given her choices so that she could reach for the best education available to her.
And money had carried her through to launch her now into this next exciting phase of her life.
Of course it wasn’t all about the money. It was about her hard work, her family’s love for her and trust in her abilities. It was about our faith in her potential and her faith in her own future.
It wasn’t all about the money at all. But money played a part and, as I wrote that last check, I thanked the money and the grace that it bestowed.
Money did represent love here and it did mark a passing – the passing of time, the achievement of success, a step into the future, and yes, the expression of love.
